"Fear & Loathing in Denver" or "The Thompson is a Lonely Hunter"

Hello.

Due to a threatening email from "California Kay", I am "back" writing. Sorta. I think.

Why now?

I don't know.

Perhaps it's because, even though I don't really know Kay (Does anyone REALLY know anyone?), I like her. I dont like many people, and yet I like lots of people. I'm very deep that way (or at least that's what I keep telling myself), I have a love/hate relationship with the human race. Although, most of the time I lean waaaaaaay towards the hate. Aaaaanyway, Kay had(?) a nasty bout of this thing called Cancer. You might have heard of it. She seems much better now. I'd like to think that my dumbass humor and whatever it is that makes some people like me helped in keeping her spirit up (or at least that's what I keep telling myself). So, I guess in a way, I feel I owe her. I mean, if with all the crap she's been through, she still is interested in what I have to say...took the time to track my MySpace page down and write a threatening email....I gotta do it, right?

Besides, she's tiny, cusses like a sailor and kinda scares me. I mean, if a big, fat, angry bitch came at me all pissed of and crazay, I'd probably slap that bitch down to save my life, but a teeny tiny, angry lil broad? I'd be like the comical elephant terrified of the little mouse.

Perhaps, it's because I just felt like it.

Perhaps, it's "The Voices" making me do it.

I say we blame that lil fuzzy headed garden pixie, Kay.

So, here we is....

You're prolly axin yourself (Note to new readers, if any, I don't really spelled that crappy. I "act" stupid to hide just how smart I am. ....ar at least that's what I keep tellingf myself)...you're prolly axin "What's J been up too?".

No?

Well, lets just act as if...

What have I been up too?

Nuthin.

Not a goddamn thing. I quit my job in July, which seemed to be RIGHT before the economy went totally in the shitter, and I took a 4-5 month vacation. I did nothing. I didn't even get as fat as I thought I would. Nuthin, Main, I dids nuthin.
The last couple months I've been looking for a job, and since I'm picky, lazy and picky, I'm not having much luck. Sure, the gas station down the street is hiring, and Arby's needs people, but that aint for me. I'm your typical lazy, spoilt American, some jobs are below me.....or at least that's what I kee.....meh, let's end that joke now, k? It's old like Ross Peroit's pecker. Whoever that is (I know; but he's old and dropped off, dig?).

So, um, where was I? Ah yes, nothing. I'm a pretty good saver, and don't have many bills, so I've been doing alright financially, but I'm running out of dough. I better find something fast.

What else? Hm....I watched a documentary called "Heavy Metal Baghdad" today. It's about this metal band in Iraq and all the bullshit they have to deal with. For instance, they can't grow long hair because that might give someone cause to kill them. The place they practiced got blown to shit by a missle along with their gear. They have to be back home by 6 in the evening because the psychos come out at night and all Hell breaks loose. Kidnappings, killing, robbery....shit, you name it. Gunfire and shit blowing up constantly, day and night, everybody paranoid and stressed out, all the time....it's both and uplifting story and a depressing story. Fuck governments and greedy nutjobs and assholes who try and twist religion into hate and people who WANT chaos. Fuck all those guys. Nobody should have to live like these people have to in the middle east and other wartorn choatic parts of our planet. Fuck all the Chaos-mongers who perpetuate all this crap. I hope they all drop dead tomorrow and leave all us folk who just want to live and love and laugh.

Ok, I'll quit bitching.

FOR NOW! (Dun dun-dun)

Seen the movie Role Models? I hardly ever, EVER laugh outloud, but I did when I saw it in the theater. I just bought it. That's some funny shit. Goodhearted, too. I recco...recomm...you should watch it.

Ok, so that's my update....
I'm stupid
I'm lazy
I'm kinda fat
and I'm almost broke

Oh, and I hate a large portion of the human race.

Good times....good times.....

Peas out, Bloggo's.


P.S. The title was inspired by what's on the TV in the background. I watch Biography on A&E whilst I'm being lazy and fat and hating and stupid and lazy.