Thursday, November 30, 2006

Hello friends

This shall be my opus.
This shall be my epitaph.
This shall be my "manifesto".
This shall be my confessional.
I will not lie to you even though I have lied to myself.
I will bare all.
I will prostrate myself here.
I will flagellate myself (look it up :P).
This is NOT my cry for attention.
This is my way of giving.
This is what I am good at.
This medium shall be my tool to teach.
This shall be my way of begging you to not be like me.
I want you to learn from me.
Do not make my mistakes.
Do not be a dreamer who dreams TOO much.
This shall simply be facts.
This shall be about who I am and what makes me feel like a failure or a success.
This shall be about my stupidity and my smartiness.
This shall be......so many things.

I will open up my soul to you dear friends and you shall see all the ugly, sad, pathetic truth of WHO I am. You will see what I have done and what I continue to do to myself. You will also occasionally get some stupid random news item or what have you.
If you like dark humor.
If you slow down to look at car wrecks.
THIS will be the blog for you.
Again...this is NOT a cry for help, I don't want nor do I think any of you CAN help, this is simply me venting, ranting hollowing out all the SHIT inside so that maybe, eventually you, I, the universe can see to the very CORE of what the fuck is wrong with me.
Save your sadness for you.
Save your pity for others more deserving.
Save your angry "Stop feeling sorry for yourself! You suck, you faggot!" comments for others.

This is me simply emptying out all that is inside.
Some is good, and we will laugh together.
Some is bad, and we will shake our heads and "tsk...tsk what a shame" together, but it is not a pity party it is a wake, a......burning down so the Phoenix can rise again (Damn that was good. Overly dramatic shit ROCKS!).
This shall be my field of sorrow that I will harvest and till (one "l" or two? Crap man, I'm related to farm folk. They are gonna kick my ass for not knowing that!) so that I can grow something, ANYTHING better than what I have with all the shit I have available (Whoa, that was good too! 'specially the "shit"/manure metaphor-ish thing. Nice.)

And I'll throw in the occasional "Paris Hilton is the richest trailer trash in the world. How can you spend all that money and STILL look like a $5 whore with a Walmart addiction? " or whatever silly thing pops into my head from time to time just so we don't completely lose it k?

k.

This will be my....um....sorry, a woman with a really nice ass wearing cords just walked in. what was I talking about? Ah yes...wallow, wallow, bitch, moan...sad..very sad....insane...sometimes randomly funny.
Got it!

Read if you want.
Believe if you want.
I don't care, and yet I do.
I will write about whatever the fuck I like, it's my bloggy and I'll cry if I want to.

:P

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

sounds like you and i are in the same place. even if we do live in different states.

you can bet i'll be reading. misery loves company! :)

Anonymous said...

Huh. I don't think you were hard enough on yourself. You definitely need a new flogger.

phoenix said...

ummm ok but I already have the Phoenix from the ashes goin on so ummm get another metaphor k? :P

Anonymous said...

YES AWESOME! ...teen.

Well, that's what people would tell me if I wrote that. And I would. I feel the same way about blogging, I WILL READ!!!!!!!!!

lol.

Wendy said...

it was always your blog, even the other one I knew about.

You have always been able to say and do as you wish. Even if it involves excluding me. (That was a joke ;) )